The Real Deal

My friend Jeni made a comment on my last post, thanking me for "keeping it real" and I just wanted to let you all know I am all about keeping it real...nowadays. There was a day when I was all about the illusion of perfection. Perfect house, perfect kids, perfect hubby with the perfect job, perfect rule keeper, perfect in my testimony...just perfect. What!?! you say...but...but...I know, not the person you see in front of you, is it? I had a wake up call a few years back. While I was trying so hard to appear perfect, things were falling apart around me. I blame it on my Mother. WHAT!!! I know, I know ...You all think my Mom has been Sainted in my memories of her. Not true. I love my Mom and she would have been the first to tell you about her perceived short-comings. My Mom and Dad never fought in front of us. EVER. It just didn't happen. My Mom was such a private person. Very few people were "in the know" about the goings on in our house. So in my warped and twisted little mind I took that not as "don't air your dirty laundry in public" but "deny having dirty laundry, or dirty house, or dirty kids...". That was just how I rolled. Then I met Joan. A salty gal in her golden years that opened my eyes to a great number of things. Such as...are ya ready...no one is perfect. Yep, she laid it out plain for me so I didn't mess it up. There was a beautiful lady in our ward. She was just younger than me and had the "perfect" life I thought I wanted. Huge, perfect house, many beautiful kids (some with red hair), she threw gorgeous party's and had glittery friends and was the hostess with the mostess. She seemed to have a firm testimony about all things church related and everyone in her family was clean and reverent and glorious. Well, they were as far as I could tell. Joan took me aside, and with the wisdom of her age...told me I was crazy. "Lori," she said. "That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard!" She went on to patiently explain to me how not everything was as it seemed...and even if it was...so what. What a boring life that must be. She told me to get real. And I have tried to do that ever since. I don't want anyone to think my life is perfect any more. I am so far from perfect, I can't even see it from here. But I am trying to follow the example of a few choice women, including Joan, and just do my best. Sometimes it isn't good enough...but sometimes it is. Sometimes my son surprises me and cleans the kitchen while I'm at work (without being asked) and sometimes my daughter, at a fork in the road, chooses the straight and narrow path. And sometimes they don't, but we go on, just trying to get through life like everyone else. We are loud and messy and we laugh and fight entirely too much, but in the end, we are real. So if you want to come over...be prepared...we don't have a spotless house, but you are welcome anytime you need a shoulder to cry on or a good belly laugh that leaves tears streaming down your face.